Loved Like Josie

Most mornings, I take the scenic route to work. The road takes me along a bluff above the Fraser River. It's a trucking route, so most of my fellow travellers drive big rigs or weathered pickups. I like driving my little car along this road. It's peaceful. It's pretty. It's comforting.

Along the way, I pass a magnetic sign at an empty lot. The restaurant that once operated there has long since been demolished. But the sign remains, and someone has put it to good use.

This month, the sign says "Josie". There is a little red heart at the end of her name. In months prior, a lover's request pleaded "Meet me halfway, Josie". The magnets came loose over time, and the message disintegrated into "Meet me" before the words fell away entirely.

At the time, I wondered if Josie put much thought into that message. Did she want her love back? Did she think about him every morning? Was it really, truly over, now that the letters had all fallen away?

So when this latest message appeared, I was inspired. I smiled to myself and at the little heart next to her name.

Who was this lover of Josie's? What possessed him to publicly profess his love and ask for her back? Why did he choose a road sign in an empty lot, where truckers and delivery drivers and construction workers pass by? Probably not a lot of ladies have seen the sign, and very few of them are named Josie.

But he must have known her habits and that he'd catch her eye like he did when they started dating. I began to wonder... hey Josie... what did you say? I'm imagining a happy ending, and hoping all is right in their world.

The truth is, I don't know her story. Both Josie and her lover remain safely anonymous, even though she's been publicly loved from the side of a dirt-covered road. 

Wherever she is, whatever her story, it must be nice to be loved like Josie. I'm waiting for the next update on my drive in.... hopefully a good one from Josie and her love.

The Heart and Seoul of Adoption

Last night my student asked why we had homestay children when both my husband and I work. "You don't need the money, right?" he asked plainly. "It's true, we don't." I smiled at him. "We are homestay parents because we like children!" 

He looked at me like I had three heads. "Well why don't you just get pregnant and have more Noahs?"

I stopped for a second. I could have said a number of things. I could have said we liked older kids (which is true) or that we wanted the invaluable experience of sharing our home with children from other countries (which is also true).

Instead, I hit my little 11 year old homestay son with the truth. "Well, Noah is adopted, and adopting children can sometimes take a long time. We wanted Noah to have other kids in the house now." I had to explain what the term adoption meant, but once he understood, he got awfully quiet.

For once, my overly chatty pre-teen had nothing to say. He took a moment to digest the news, and I awaited his response, wondering what unfiltered comment would come flying from his mouth. (One of my favourite things about the kid is that he tells you EXACTLY what he's thinking!)

He was quiet for several moments before commenting "Wow, thank you for telling me your secret! I promise, I won't tell Noah!"

Now it was my turn to be stunned into silence. This young man hails from the largest metropolitan city in Korea. I don't know why I expected his thoughts about adoption to be like ours here in the west. I naively figured the whole world was embracing ideas of openness and shared information.... and I had to shake my head and remind myself that this was, after all, a little boy from the other side of the globe.

He was brave enough to come here and stay with us, this strange family, and listen as we explained our way of life. The least I could do was explain how wonderful adoption was in our family, and how it was no secret, and wasn't that wonderful?

I added to his shock. I logged onto the computer and showed off pictures of Noah and his big brother. That threw him for a loop - but I could see the wheels of acceptance and understanding turning as he translated the information (not just from English to Korean, but also from secrecy to openness) in his mind and heart.

It was a pretty powerful conversation. One I had to laugh about at the end. My homestay son looked at me with a very stern eye and said "You're not going to adopt ME, I hope!"

No, my dear, we're not. But we're glad you're part of our family for now.

Happy Foster Family Month - a Letter from our Deputy Minister

This letter is from Deputy Minister Stephen Brown in appreciation of foster families, and MCFD staff this October. Help celebrate foster family month by giving thanks all of those that help support our children and youth in care.

October is Foster Family Month in British Columbia, a time to acknowledge and celebrate the extraordinary work of foster families throughout the province – families who provide a healthy, stable and caring home for children and youth, at a time when they need it the most.


It’s also a time to recognize the important role of so many ministry staff in supporting the vulnerable children and youth who come into government care – as well as the many families who need our assistance to become healthy enough to care for their own. The connections you forge with foster families and the bridges you help build to community services and organizations not only help keep children safe but work to create a strong system of support that they can rely on for many years to come.


Each day, you are faced with complex, challenging and extraordinarily sensitive situations – and each day you rise to the challenge of your work, knowing that your support for children, youth, families and foster families can make all the difference.

I’ve been fortunate to meet with some of you over the past six months and I look forward to meeting more of you as I continue to travel the province. I also want to acknowledge the work of not just front line staff, but those who work ‘behind the scenes’ to help improve our system of care and make it more responsive to the needs of those we serve.

This October, please join me in acknowledging foster families around the province – and don’t forget to take a few moments to acknowledge the importance of your own work and that of your colleagues. It can – and does – change lives.



Thank you.

Sincerely,

Stephen Brown

Way to Go Ontario!

At the risk of tooting our own horn, I must admit that BC is great at supporting our adoptive parents. We offer post-adoption assistance to families whose children have special needs (projected or diagnosed) at the time of placement. These supports can include respite care funding, counselling, tutoring, or other supports related to a child's special placement needs.

Our government also extends monthly maintenance payments to qualifying families who meet certain criteria.... currently, that includes adoption of sibling sets, cultural matches, or child-specific adoptions where the adoptive parent and child(ren) have a strong emotional bond PRIOR to the adoption. Learn more about the Post Adoption Assistance Program for MCFD adoptions by clicking here.

The good news for our friends in Ontario? Their provincial government has announced their plan to offer similar financial supports to families who adopt from foster care.

As much as I adore the west coast, I do believe Ontario just one-upped us. Their new program includes financial supports for adoptions of children age 10 and over. What a great concept! Teens and tweens deserve families, too - how great for Ontario to recognize and implement a program to ease some of the financial barriers for growing families of older kids & teens. 

Read the full article on the great news here.