Daddy's New Wheels

My husband's a trooper. But the thought of taking our son to daycare on the bus every morning through another rainy winter was too much. So, after much discussion, Kevin got carte blanche to purchase whatever four wheeled vehicle he wanted, as long as it was under our set budget.

I wasn't quite sure what I expected him to bring home. Maybe a trustworthy Honda Civic, or a four door VW of some sort. I thought *maybe* he'd go for an SUV, and possibly a small pickup truck. SMALL pickup truck. A-hem.  SMALL. 

What he ended up bringing home was a 2006 dodge 1500 quad cab 4X4 with tires taller than our son. It barely (and I do mean BARELY) fits into our parkade. On the roads, it takes up an entire lane, just like the transit buses. A friend joked that if he jumped off the deck (which he likes to threaten lightheartedly to do on occasion), he'll be just fine because the roof of the truck is only 3 centimetres below. 

It's my fault, too. I helped him in his search. I had no idea what I was looking for. I had simple instructions: 

Dodge Ram 1500 or Ford F150

Quad Cab or Crew Cab. 

No more than 7 years old.

No more than 100,000km 

4 x 4.  *must* be a 4x4.

Okay, I could find that, and I did. I think I gave him about thirty trucks to choose from. When we finally went to see the keeper, I didn't notice how genuinely gargantuan it was. 

But THAT wasn't my fault. It was dark out. The truck was parked in the driveway of a giant home out in Langley. Did I mention it was dark out?? Ugh. I had no idea how it would dwarf our little sedan, or make my child look like a hand puppet when he stood, grinning, in the shadow of its overgrown tires.

I tried to drive it. I really did. But I felt like I was driving a tank, and I absolutely failed at parking. "What's that, honey? You want me to reverse into our spot? And NOT hit the posts? And NOT run over your precious motorcycle? I think that's asking a little much." 

I asked Little Man if he liked daddy's truck. "So excited, momma!  Big yuck! Wanna drive it and honka da horn." Unfortunately he's grown to hate our little car now that he's ridden in style in daddy's new ride. And I have to admit, I'm a little jealous.

No, I'm not interested in getting a truck. No way, no how, no thank you. (Remember, I can't even park it.) But I wouldn't mind something a little bigger, and hey, the truck seats six! So that's one more potential kiddo we can welcome home.

Um, hello? Kevin? Are you there? 

Oh well, if he's jumping off the deck, at least now he'll have a safe place to land.