Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Wait...ing

Waiting is defined as "remaining ready". In adoption, many of us are READY to be parents before the ink is dry on our application. However we come to adoption, it's usually based on loss, and our emotional readiness is often there long before we're trained and approved to parent through adoption. So we're already WAITING from the day we get started. And all of us know - or at least come to know, that waiting in adoption is a whole other kind of "remaining ready".  

Regular waiting is manageable, because there's a defined end or resolution in sight. My son can't wait to be 5, but he's comforted knowing his birthday will be coming in a number of months, sometime after summer vacation, and shortly after Halloween.

But waiting in the adoption journey is difficult at best. Unless you've waded through your own wait, it's hard to imagine the mix of emotions that waiting parents experience at this stage of the journey.

With a drop in all types of adoption, the waits are becoming longer. The usual advice "build your village", or "read, research, and network" help some, but when the wait seems like forever, it helps to talk to someone else who's also treading water in the waiting pool.

So if you're waiting, patiently or otherwise, I'd invite you dive in to our new Vancouver Waiting Parents Group.


Our next meeting is:

Thursday, May 24th from 7pm-9pm
Trees Coffee, Yaletown

RSVP to our lovely facilitator Sandra at vancouverwaitingparents@yahoo.ca or email me at sreid@bcadoption.com to let us know if you can make it!

2 comments:

Makie's Mom said...

Just a note of encouragement. Yes, the waiting seems like FOREVER, but it is worth it - if we had been approved and through the process 1 week earlier than we were we would have missed our gorgeous, top student in the class, sporty, funny, absolute blessing of a perfect little girl (age 8 when we were matched). Sometimes (most times) the waiting seems like it will never end, but we believe that this is what was meant to be and we are so very very grateful. Keep hope, keep faith and keep going!!

Sarah Reid said...

Thanks for sharing - it helps families immensely to hear of others who have success after a long wait! Congratulations on your daughter!