Waiting is defined as "remaining ready". In adoption, many of us are READY to be parents before the ink is dry on our application. However we come to adoption, it's usually based on loss, and our emotional readiness is often there long before we're trained and approved to parent through adoption. So we're already WAITING from the day we get started. And all of us know - or at least come to know, that waiting in adoption is a whole other kind of "remaining ready".
Regular waiting is manageable, because there's a defined end or resolution in sight. My son can't wait to be 5, but he's comforted knowing his birthday will be coming in a number of months, sometime after summer vacation, and shortly after Halloween.
But waiting in the adoption journey is difficult at best. Unless you've waded through your own wait, it's hard to imagine the mix of emotions that waiting parents experience at this stage of the journey.
With a drop in all types of adoption, the waits are becoming longer. The usual advice "build your village", or "read, research, and network" help some, but when the wait seems like forever, it helps to talk to someone else who's also treading water in the waiting pool.
So if you're waiting, patiently or otherwise, I'd invite you dive in to our new Vancouver Waiting Parents Group.
Our next meeting is:
Thursday, May 24th from 7pm-9pm
Trees Coffee, Yaletown
RSVP to our lovely facilitator Sandra at vancouverwaitingparents@yahoo.ca or email me at sreid@bcadoption.com to let us know if you can make it!